


Feelings in Bloom

by Skyeec2



Series: Sefikura Week 2018 [3]
Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Kinda body horror?, M/M, Pining, Unrequited Love, hanahaki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-27
Updated: 2018-01-27
Packaged: 2019-03-10 07:36:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13497570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyeec2/pseuds/Skyeec2
Summary: Sephiroth had heard that love was supposed to be an amazing, life altering thing. If that was true, then why did the feelings cause him so much pain?





	Feelings in Bloom

**Author's Note:**

> The prompt for this one was Hanahaki

The first time was barely remembered by Sephiroth.

He had just returned from a long mission in the Northern Continent, having spent over a week in the freezing snow-covered land hunting down monsters that had attacked a few homes, barely able to remain on his feet and eager to return to the safety and comfort of his own bed.

But then Zack called him, telling him that Cloud was stealing his kitchen to cook something and he was welcome to come join them, to indulge in some home-cooking for once. He couldn’t bring himself to pass up the opportunity to spend time with the two after so long away, especially with the promise of food being provided, from Cloud no less, who never failed to please Sephiroth’s taste buds.

The night had been more than enjoyable, filled with good food and pleasant company. He enjoyed the chance to speak to Cloud, the younger was often too busy with his own responsibilities in the infantry to spare time for them and days where the younger was free and awake enough to spend time with them. Cloud was always more of a listener than a speaker, but he must have realized how exhausted Sephiroth was because he took control of conversation, speaking where Sephiroth would have and letting him remain quiet until he left for his own rooms, a bowl of leftovers cradled to his chest.

He put it away in his fridge once he was back in his room, deciding not to bother with the hassle of a shower and having to dry his hair and collapsed in his bed, burrowing under his blankets and falling into unconsciousness as soon as his head hit the pillow.

He awoke the next morning, barely remembering the coughing fit that awoke him during the midnight hours. He lifted himself from his bed, stumbling his way towards the shower to wash the last few days from his skin and the build up from his hair. When he emerged from the shower he saw a small bit of purple on the floor by his bed, smaller than his fingernail.

He lifted it from the floor, surprised to discover that it was actually a tiny, purple flower. He disposed of the blossom, assuming that it had been left in his apartment by Zack the last time the other had been in his apartment, left there as Sephiroth hadn’t gotten the chance to clean before being shipped out.

He put the odd appearance out of his mind, continuing with his day; the only reminder of his coughing fit a slight dryness in his throat and an odd tickle that disappeared within the first hour of being awake.

He ignored the flowers he saw around his bed upon waking over the next few days, explaining away each instance as easily as he breathed.

Or, at least he did until the day he had a coughing fit at his table, over the bowl of leftovers Cloud had given him. It came over him suddenly, catching him off guard as he set down the bowl of steaming food on the table, it was only a small cough, but insistent. He felt like there was something stuck in his airway, something long and satiny, irritating his throat as he forced it from his lungs.

When he finally managed to dislodge whatever it was, he looked down at his hands, staring at the  _ thing _ he held.

It was the same kind of flower he’d been discovering by his bed the past few mornings, but longer, numerous little flowers clinging to a vine. They were covered in saliva and wet in his hand, sticking to his skin in a disconcerting mess of saliva and mucus.

He flinched at the sight of them, flinging the flowers away from him and abandoning the steaming food still on his table. He fled to his room and didn’t emerge until well into the next day.

It didn’t happen again for another few weeks, he was starting to believe that he’d imagined the event altogether; the results of a walking nightmare perhaps. He’d just returned from meeting Cloud for coffee, their two schedules allowing them the chance to meet, and had just entered his office when he started coughing again, leaning back against his door as his lungs revolted against something within them.

He hacked and coughed until he felt something brush against the top of his mouth, he reached into his mouth to pry the thing from his mouth. But he didn’t get the chance to inspect it, as he was still coughing, his body working to dispel the foreign objects from his lungs.

He was thankful that his office was sound-proof else someone else might have heard the awful, wet hacking noises that were forced from him as he coughed up flowers for something close to ten minutes. When he was finally able to pull his hands away from his mouth he was left staring at numerous clumps of tiny flowers, some silken and purple, the rest fuzzy and yellow.

His chest heaved with his strained breaths, shock and horror keeping his thoughts halted in his mind as he stared down at the yellow and purple flowers that he held clasped in his hands. He eventually managed to force himself into movement, stumbling over to his desk and depositing the saliva-soaked petals before him.

He dropped his head into his hands, exhaustion overwhelming him momentarily.

After what felt like an eternity, he lifted his head from his hands and turned his attention to the computer set up at his desk; he wouldn’t get anywhere just sitting there, he needed to find out what was happening to him.

Long hours and numerous dead ends found him on a small forum page detailing a very rare disease that sounded achingly similar to what he was experiencing; Hanahaki, the disease where flowers grew in the lungs in response to unrequited love and would continue to grow until they suffocated the sufferer completely.

But that would mean that he was in love and he couldn’t be, he would have realized it if he was.

He thought back to the time he had asked Angeal about what love felt like; his friend had described it as an increased fondness, feeling happier in another person’s presence than he had just moments before, and wanting to see another so much that he made time in his schedule to see them.

He didn’t feel that way about anyone, the only person even close to inspiring those kind of feelings was…

…

Cloud.

It was Cloud.

A startled laugh escaped his throat as the realization swept over him; he was in love with Cloud and Cloud, didn’t return those feelings.

The forum said there were only two known cures to Hanahaki; your love being returned or a very dangerous surgery that removed the infected tissue from his lungs and the feelings of love with it.

He swallowed heavily, weighing his options carefully before opening another tab, searching for a doctor within Midgar that could cure him of his disease. He found one eventually but it was too late to contact them, he lifted himself from his chair, shutting down his computer and gathering the now-dry flowers from his desk to dispose of them.

He was hit by another fit of coughing as he entered his rooms, leaving him with more flowers to dispose of. He supposed he should be thankful that he was only coughing up small flowers and not the full blooms he had read about.

But the return of the flowers reminded him that he had promised to join Cloud in the gym the next day, to help him with his swordwork. Meaning he would need to wait a bit of time be could contact the doctor in the morning, though he was certain that he’d be able to handle things during the duration of the morning.

His thoughts were proven false a moment later when the coughing started once again, they passed quickly and he was only left with a few lines of small yellow flowers in his hands, but they still left him shaken.

It seemed that now he knew what was affecting him and why, the cough increased, more flowers growing in his lungs now that he had realized that he was, in fact, in love with Cloud. He barely slept that night but he was still able to meet Cloud like he promised; he could go days without sleep, a single night wasn’t going to ruin him.

He was granted a reprieve during his time with Cloud, seemingly bereift of flowers for the moment. It was an odd experience, seeing Cloud for the first time since realizing he was in love with him almost like he was seeing the other for the very first time. His mind kept picking out things about the other man; the smile on his face when he got a move right, the focused expression on his face as Sephiroth explained or showed him something, how natural it felt to work with him and, perhaps more importantly, the way his eyes lit up when Sephiroth congratulated him.

Time passed far too quickly for Sephiroth’s liking and their hours together finished, Cloud needed to return to his duties and Sephiroth to his own work. Sephiroth found himself lingering, wanting to spend more time with Cloud in his current circumstance; the emotions would be gone soon, he wanted to experience them to the fullest while he could.

Cloud must have picked up that something was wrong though, as he turned a concerned look up to him. “You ok, Sephiroth?” He asked, voice matching his expression. “You’re kinda out of it.”

Sephiroth took a moment to breathe, mentally shaking himself for causing Cloud to worry about him. “I’m fine,” he said, words as steady as he could make them, portraying confidence and certainly. “There’s no need to worry about me.”

Cloud’s eyes narrowed at him, not quite believing his reassurance, but choosing not to push him. “You’ll tell me if you need to, right?”

Sephiroth found himself nodding, though he knew that he wouldn’t be telling Cloud anything about what was currently afflicting him he didn’t want the younger to feel pressured into returning his feelings. He would handle this on his own.

“Good,” Cloud said, nodding himself and relaxing his shoulders. “I’ll see you tomorrow right? Dinner at Zack’s?”

Ah, yes, that was something they all did together, wasn’t it? How could he have forgotten that weekly occurrence?

“I will do my best to attend,” he promised, unsure if he’d be able to have dinner with his two friends with his disease. He didn’t want to worry them with a sudden coughing fit and be forced to explain thing to them.

He’d keep this to himself, until it was passed and things returned to the way they should be.

“I’ll see you there then,” Cloud said, pulling Sephiroth from his thoughts as he left the gym.

He watched Cloud leave, gaze trained on the doors that had just closed after the other and blocked him from his sight. The only warning to his upcoming cough fit was a slight tickle at the back of his throat, spasms wracking his frame and almost sending him to the floor under their strength.

When it passed he looked at the blossoms cradled in his hands, surprised to see a new flower amongst them. A single pale pink blossom lay with the smaller purple and yellow flowers, he picked it out gingerly, inspecting the new addition curiously. It’s outer petals were pink but on the inside they became a deep crimson at the centre of the flower. He supposed it might have been pleasing to the eye, if he hadn’t just spent a few minutes hacking it from his lungs.

He lifted himself from his knees, stumbling a few steps before he steadied himself and leave the gym seemingly fine to those around him. He made his way back to his office to arrange an appointment with the specialist, the flowers were becoming larger and more frequent, he needed to be rid of them as quickly as he could.

Unfortunately, he couldn’t get an appointment until late in the next week, there was a lot of preparation needed for the surgery he would need and that was the soonest it could be ready. He thanked the specialist for arranging things as quickly as they could before hanging up, relieved that he at least had a date to work towards and that the flowers would be removed as soon as they could be.

He merely had to endure until the date. He could do that.

That of course, proved more difficult than he thought it would be. The flowers continued to grow in his lungs at a steady rate, now leaving him with bouquets of purple, yellow and pink numerous times a day.

He had somehow managed to keep his condition a secret from Cloud and Zack, they were worried about him surely, he had had to cancel a few of their plans together, feeling awful each time he did so, but they didn’t know about his Hanahaki.

He was hoping to make up for it tonight though, the coughing fits had eased a bit today and he felt confident enough to have them over. He had volunteered to cook tonight as well, a further apology to his friends for being so distant with them the past few days.

Cloud arrived just as he was setting the lasagna to cook for the final few minutes, nervous and early, he looked up at him with a searching expression. Sephiroth felt trapped by the other’s stare, frozen in place and unable to move under the blue eyes focused upon him. He waited, expecting Cloud to realize everything that had been happening and leave the apartment, never to speak to him again, but that was just his thoughts getting the best of him.

What happened instead was Cloud blinking, releasing him from his stare and flushing slightly, pink rising to his cheeks in an attractive display, eyes ducking away from Sephiroth’s own. “I’m glad you’re feeling better,” Cloud sadi softly, shy for some reason. “I, we, were really worried about you.”

“I’m alright,” he reassured the other, unaware that his voice had dropped in a quiet volume similar to Cloud’s own. “Things are alright.” He wanted to reach out to the other, reassure him through touch as well as words, but he held himself back, knowing that that might have pushed a boundary with the other.

He only had a few days of being in love with Cloud left, he didn’t want to waste them by making the other uncomfortable.

“Good,” Cloud breathed, shifting in front of him awkwardly.

“Come in,” Sephiroth said, stepping back to allow Cloud into his apartment. “Dinner will be done in a few minutes, and Zack is sure to be arriving soon.”

“Yeah,” Cloud said, walking into his apartment and taking off his shoes at the door before looking back at him. “You need help with anything?”

“You can help me set the table if you’d like,” Sephiroth offered, getting Cloud’s agreement before walking back into his kitchen and handing the plates and cutlery to the younger.

Dinner was a pleasant affair and he enjoyed the chance to spend time with both Zack and Cloud, they both enjoyed his food and the conversation flowed easily. They put on a movie once dinner was done, just wanting to spend more time together, Zack and Cloud left afterwards, bidding him a good evening and hoping to see him soon.

He felt good as he bid them farewell and that high stayed with him for the rest of the night as he prepared for bed, it lasted until the next day when he suddenly realized that he hadn’t had a coughing fit since the previous morning. This revelation confused him, as the forms hadn’t said anything about the flowers stopping, so the only thing that should have affected them was…

But that was impossible; he was sure that he was still in love with Cloud, that certainly hadn’t faded within the past week. Meaning that the only possibility was that…

Cloud returned his affections.

As if brought on by the thought, another coughing fit overcame him; though it wasn’t anywhere near as severe as it had been even a day prior. It ended quickly enough, with him having to pull a blossom from his mouth as it clung stubbornly to his throat, he opened his eyes once it was out and stared down at the flower.

It was a new flower, one he hadn’t seen before, and larger than the others had been. It was a lovely shade of orangy-pink and was different than anything he’d ever seen before; petals were layered on top of each other in a pleasing pattern, the centre of the flower a bright yellow colour, similar to Cloud’s hair.

He took a picture of the flower with his PHS, searching for its name. He found it after a few moments, a page showing him pictures of flowers identical to what he held in his hand.

_ Ambrosia _ .

Seemed he wouldn’t need that surgery after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Purple Lilac - First Emotions of Love | Yellow Acacia - Secret Love | Rose of Sharon - Consumed by Love | Ambrosia - Love is reciprocated


End file.
